Umrah with Family 2017!

Ya Allah! Alhamdulillah syukur di jemput Allah untuk umrah 2017. Membawa dosa dosa mohon untuk diampunkan, dan membawa hajat mohon Allah perkenankan. Everything is,  we guess a surprise from Allah, as it was so last minute. Moga Allah jemput lagi.

Muhammad's ikhtifal and The Best Student Award

Last weekend was ihtifal day at Muhammad's Nursery. I think I just have to blog this as a memory to myself/ Friday was report day. I arrived at the nursery around 5ish, Muhammad was at home. Hubbyhad sent him back as my MIL was at home to look after Yusuf.

Honestly, I am not putting any expectation, not to downgrade my son but I dont want to put any pressure to myself let alone to Muhammad. For me and Afif, Muhammad is still young, I try my best not to go with the flow being a kiasu mom, strereotype parents. Moreover, Muhammad is just in nursery for less than 6 month. Despite so happy with his development (selawat/zikir all the time even when we were shopping -____-), again I dont want to put any pressure to me and Muhammad. 

So it's true when people say, low expectation is the key to happiness. I took it as a pleasant surprise when teacher said Muhammad is doing really well at school. My jaw dropped when the teacher mentioned Muhamma is the BEST STUDENT for his class. He got 3 papers full marks and 1 paper 89%.  The teachers added, the best student not only evaluated based on papers alone, it was also  based on akhlak in the class, in short overall performance. Alhamdulillah alhamdulillah. All praises and thanks be to Allah. 

On ihtifal day, Muhammad looked so happy with his best friends, Muazz and Muizz, the twin. I was cry a bucket (of course as a ratu air mata lol). My son is grown up. Now, where's the time fly?

Dont cry ummi..you are strong!

Life has been so tiring over the past few months after we arrived in Malaysia. Even more since last two weeks for house hunting and such. Last week in between viewing the house to rent Muhammad said "Ummi, let's just go back to Glasgow, we have house there, remember the tall one at 2 Taylor Place.." , he added "I miss everyone". Sometimes, after solat when I asked him to recite doa, dengan kusyuk he will recite "O Allah please give us surga, please give ummi and babah job, please give us house, and please give me school and thank you Allah for everything". Ummi would just cry cry cry 😭😭😭. And he would pat my back and say "Dont cry Ummi, you are strong!" 

Alhamdulillah a'la kulli hal.

Cat and dog

Semalam tengok cerita pasal kucing

Babah: Do you want a cat? I can buy you a cat
Muhd: yea....no. I dont want a cat. I want a dog 😐😳😳.
Babah: But cat is nice.
Muhd: No.. Cat is not nice, cat hurt people, dog is nice to play with.

Alamak..kontroversi statement ni kalau di Malaysia ni


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Muhammad dan monster

Dialog

Ummi: Monster takde kan?
Muhammad: Akkdde (takde)
Ummi: Ada siapa?
Muhammad: Allah!!

Sebabb Muhammad kalau dok main sorang sorang, mesti tunjuk tunjuk kat dinding kat tingkap.. Ummi see.. Monster monster 😱😱😱.

Bukan mudah nak menanam konsep tauhidik dalam diri anak kecil. Moga Allah beri petunjuk ameen.

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Nursery baru Muhammad

Alhamdulillah, dah genap sebulan Muhammad memula kan sesi nursery di tempat baru. Pada awalnya, agak mencabar juga nak dapatkan tempat, cukup sekadar saya nyatakan kes terpencil racist 'halus'. Moga Allah ampunkan dosa saya jika itu adalah andaian yang semakin di api apikan oleh syaitan.

Rezeki Muhammad telah tertulis di situ, biarpun ada pihak yang kurang senang, cuba untuk tidak memberi peluang. Adakala kurang sabar juga bila mendengar cerita cerita yang tidak masuk akal yang diada adakan. Walau saya boleh berlapang dada dengan teguran membina dan boleh menerima adakala Muhammad bukanlah seorang yang duduk diam tegak sopan santun, tetapi kerana komen yang diberikan sangat kontra berbanding guru guru professional dari nursery lama. Setelah beberapa kali dan insiden berbeza, suami pun menyatakan perkara yang sama. Tetapi suami lebih bertegas menyatakan hak dan pendapat, berbanding saya yang agak kurang suka menimbulkan konflik.

Namun, setelah kurang lebih sebulan, keadaan berubah 360 darjah.

Sesampainya Muhammad akan dicium dipeluk oleh 'individu' tersebut. Begitu juga sebelum pulang. Kerap kali juga suami bercerita Muhammad dipuji puji oleh individu tersebut dan guru guru kerana sikapnya yang mudah memanjakan diri. Suatu hari mereka excited sebab Muhammad panggil mereka dengan panggilan darling! He just made my day katanya.

Alhamdulillah all went well. Mendengar kisah Muhammad dan pengurus di nursery baru mengingatkan saya salah satu ayat favorite dalam surah Fussilat Ayat 34.

وَلَا تَسْتَوِي الْحَسَنَةُ وَلَا السَّيِّئَةُ ادْفَعْ بِالَّتِي هِيَ أَحْسَنُ فَإِذَا الَّذِي بَيْنَكَ وَبَيْنَهُ عَدَاوَةٌ كَأَنَّهُ وَلِيٌّ حَمِيمٌ.

Dan tidaklah sama (kesannya dan hukumnya) perbuatan yang baik dan perbuatan yang jahat. Tolaklah (kejahatan yang ditujukan kepadamu) dengan cara yang lebih baik; apabila engkau berlaku demikian maka orang yang menaruh rasa permusuhan terhadapmu, dengan serta merta akan menjadi seolah-olah seorang sahabat karib.

MasyaAllah ayat yang indah. Allah menyambung lagi dalam ayat seterusnya

Dan sifat yang terpuji ini tidak dapat diterima dan diamalkan melainkan oleh orang-orang yang bersikap sabar, dan tidak juga dapat diterima dan diamalkan melainkan oleh orang yang mempunyai bahagian yang besar dari kebahagiaan dunia dan akhirat.

MasyaAllah.. Setiap hari Allah mendidik hati dan diri dengan suatu yang baru, walaupun melalui anak kecil.


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Bermusafir ke Holland dan Brussels - Spring 2014

Sudah lama menanam impian hendak melihat dengan mata sendiri, tulips ciptaan Allah yang maha kuasa di Amsterdam. Seingat saya, dari umur 15 tahun. Lamanya berangan! :D. Alhamdulillah, Allah kabulkan setelah hampir 15 tahun kemudiannya. Ke Amsterdam. Bermusafir. Mencari kebesaran Allah untuk memujinya.

Kami bermusafir selama 4 hari 3 malam, keluarga kecil kami bersama dua sahabat, tidak mengambil sebarang cuti kerana Isnin sudah sedia cuti bank holiday. Kami mengambil flight dari Edinburgh (sebab murah!). Perancangan teliti dibuat sebelum bercuti, kedai halal di mana, apakah pengangkutan yang praktikal, berapa tempat hendak pergi, dicelah celah kesibukan. Thanks to Anip yang banyak buat research. Kalau buat PhD tu memang excellent lah bab travel ni :p.

Sebab kedai halal susah nak jumpa, kami bawa siap siap dari Glasgow bahan mentah, daging dan kambing direbus dan ayam siap di separuh goring, ikan bilis, rempah sup, garam, sabun taharah, tupperware, Maggie, beras, garam. Saya siap siap masak nasi goreng dari rumah untuk makan malam, sebab hasil kajian dengan encik google, susah mencari kedai halal bila tiba di Amsterdam nanti.

Setelah selesai urusan sewa kereta di airport kami menuju ke apartment yang telah di book. (Ada a few website option untuk book apartment yang ok, pilih based on practicality in case nak naik public transport, safety, price, condusive/utilities, based on review as well. Boleh rujuk tripadvisor, wimdu, housetrip, airbnb). Alhamdulillahh.. Apartment yang kami sewa sangat sangat condusive, sangat accessible dari highway dan city, sangat kedai dengan market to buy groceries and free parking. Di sana kami menyewa kereta setelah menimbang kira banyak perkara terutamanya kewangan :p.

First day kami ke Brussels, walaupun Brussels bukanlah main agenda pun. Perjalanan Amsterdam – Brussels hanyalah 2 jam drive. Main attraction di Brussels berdekatan Antara satu sama lain. Antara yang berkesempatan kami lawati adalah Mini Europe, Atomium, Minneken Pis, Grand Palais.

Mini Europe adalah taman tema dimana main attraction di Europe dibina dalam skala kecil, 1:250 kalau tak silap, seolah olah tour Europe dalam satu hari . 

Excited Muhammad nampak keretapi kecil live!

Di Brussels..

Basically, satu hari je dah cukup dah nak lawat semua main attraction kat Brussels. On that night, kami balik semula ke Amsterdam. Esoknya kami ke Taman Bunga Tulips Kaukenhoff. Taman ini di buka pada tarikh tarikh tertentu sahaja pada setiap tahun bila bunga tulip berkembang. Contohnya tahun ni dah tak bukak dah. Next year akan dibuka start March - Jun 2016. MasyaAllahh besarr tamannya. Mabuk bunga jadinya.

Beratur untuk churros and waffle. Berbeza dengan paris yang popular dengan pastries nya, di Holland and Brussels, lebih popular dengan waffle and churros. 

Berbekalkan nasi lemak, kami berkelah di tempat car park. Dan selesai sekali Jamak Qasar di situ.

Kita adalah ghuraba'

"Islam began as something strange, and it shall return to being something strange, so give glad tidings to the strangers."[Sahih Bukhari]

Petangnya kami ke Den Haag, pusat pentadbiran Holland. Nothing interesting di sini. Cuma building yang menarik. Sempat menjengah ke pusat bandar Amsterdam lewat petangnya. 

MasyaAllah lawa bandarnya. Dikelilingi 'dam' dan jambatan jambatan kecil, namun dicemari dengan penjualan souvenir, weed dan aksesori lucah. Katanya penjualan weed secara terbuka di sini adalah legal. Kami tidak berani berlama lama di bandar. Balik rumah masak nasi goreng sebab dah malas nak pusing mencari kedai halal. Namun katanya kedai halal sangat banyak di bandar Amsterdam. 

Esoknya kami ke Zan Shee Chan (one of point of interest di Holland) untuk melihat kincir angin. It's a very lovely place macam kampung kecil I can stay there forever :D 

Sebelum akhirnya ke bandar, ke arca I AMSTERDAM 

 All in all it was a good and well planned trip. Dapat release minda and spend quality time with my heroes. Dapat juga mengenal budaya setempat, membuka minda dan mengambil ibrah dalam setiap perjalanan/pengalaman tak kira besar atau kecil.

Cukuplah ALLAH sebagai sandaran

 Terkesan dengan kisah arwah Ahmad Ammar, pemuda yang disebut sebut, pemuda yang cintakan syahid,  kematiannya, kematian  yang menghidupkan. Menghidupkan hati hati pemuda lain. Ammar tidak dikenali semasa hayatnya, namun setelah kembalinya menemui pencipta, seluruh bumi bagaikan bersedih. Saya mencari cari artikel, talk, dan berbagai sumber, ingin mengenali arwah Ammar. Saya temui talk oleh parents Ammar di youtube, penulisan ustaz Hasrizal yang kenal agak rapat dengan arwah. Saya salin setiap satunya, bagaimana ibu ayahnya mendidik Ammar, pengalaman mereka, formula mereka melahirkan Ahmad Ammar.

Hati terkesan. Amat terkesan.

Saya belajar sesuatu dari pembacaan dan pencarian. Tentang ikhlas. Mudah menyebut,tapi aplikasinya, L. Payah nak didik hati, cukuplah kalau hanya Allah yang tahu.

Kalau memasak, mesti Tanya suami sedap tak (setiap hari!) nak suami cakap sedap. Sedangkan cukuplah Allah tahu yang kita buat yang terbaik untuk keluarga setiap hari.

Kalau buat labwork, bila menulis report, bila habis meeting, hati mesti berbunga bunga bila supervisor puji cakap excellent! good work! You are very good! Tidak cukupkah hanya Allah yang tahu segala kerja keras.

Kalau buat labwork susah susah, ada kawan ambil kredit, hati rasa terkilan kalau supervisor tak recognize. Tidak cukupkah hanya Allah menilai semuanya. Tidak senang hatikah kalau hanya sekadar Allah tahu.

Kalau tidak bersalah, tapi dituduh bersalah, tidak cukupkah hanya Allah untuk tenangkan dan bahagiakan hati, tidak cukupkah perhatian Allah kepada kita L

Allah menyebut dalam Surah Al An’am, ayat 59:

One of my favorite ayat, amat indah masyaAllah

Dan pada sisi Allah lah kunci kunci segala yang ghaib ada pada Nya; tidak ada yang mengetahui selain Dia. Dia mengetahui apa yang di daratan dan di lautan. Tidak ada sehelai daun pun yang gugur yang tidak diketahuiNya, tidak jatuh sebutir biji pun dalam kegelapan bumi dan tidak pula sesuatu yang basah atau yang kering, melainkan tertulis dalam kitabNya yang nyata 

5 Essential Hacks for a Professional Muslimah

A note for me to refer.
An article in productive muslim

Here are some of the ‘life hacks’ that have helped boost my productivity both at work and home. In sha Allah I hope it will also allow you to gain more control over your time to do the things that matter most in your working day:

1. Do a “Week Ahead View”
For me, preparation starts on most Sunday evenings. I start to plan and assess my forthcoming week, by doing simple things like looking at my calendar plans for the week for any important meetings or deadlines, to help me get a sense of what my week will look like. This allows me to factor in a ‘buffer zone’, which is the time needed to prepare for a meeting or travel somewhere. If I know that the week ahead will be particularly busy in meetings or other deadlines, then I am very careful to accept any ‘non-urgent’ tasks – sometimes it is better to say no! Additionally, I almost always leave my weekend for family and social events and try to divide my time between late evenings and early evenings at work, so I can spend quality time at home. This “week ahead view” also helps me to set my intentions and think positively about getting into the office at the start of the week with an action plan, instead of dreading that Monday morning!

2. Create Priority Task List
As soon as I get into the office, I write a task list for the day. Whether it is in the form of an (evergrowing!) to-do list, or using ProductiveMuslim resources like the Taskinator, having a hand written list to stick on your desk is an immensely helpful tool to keep your day focussed. Answering emails is a tempting thing to do as soon as you reach the office, but it might be helpful to extract key tasks from emails and add them to your task list. For example, our Content Co-ordinator, Sister Samira, checks her daily emails by reading the subject line and email preview, and tagging the most important ones, like articles she is expecting etc. This way, her most important emails stand out and she doesn’t get too bogged down with non-urgent emails.
Usually by the time the afternoon comes, you have all sorts of unexpected interruptions so it’s essential you get the most important task done, or at least started, in the morning. It is also useful to use breaks between tasks to catch up with colleagues (work-related talk only!) to give you an idea about what is going on in your organisation.

3. Don’t Forget Family Tasks!
As women, I share the pain that there isn’t enough time in the working day to take care of unmet family tasks, especially in the West where working hours tend to take a large part of your day. So in order to get tasks done for my family, I usually list any important family errands on my way to work like ‘call doctors to book an appointment’ or ‘pay bills over phone’ – I usually then complete these during my lunch hour, breaks or commute from work. This ensures the family-related duties are completed and are not forgotten in my list of priority tasks for the day.The worst thing is when you have been asked by your spouse or parent to do something and then forgetting to do it, or running out of time.

4. Get a Workplace Mentor
Since I got into the working world, having an experienced mentor has been invaluable. Most companies and organisations are very understanding and accommodating in giving new employees a mentor to shadow. My manager is a female who has 10+ years of experience and so alhamdulilah, she is more like a mentor than a manager. We have a very special relationship as she offers me advice on how to progress professionally, advising me on how not to make the mistakes she has made, right down to personal advice in my life choices which I truly value and cherish. Within 2 years of joining the company, I got a promotion and raise in my salary which was due to having a supportive mentor in my manager, alhamdulilah. Having someone who sees your work day in day out and can advise you to improve in certain areas of your career is essential for growth.

5. Pursue a ‘Passion Project’
It is essential to make time to pursue your passions and interests outside of work to boost your energy and creativity as a Muslimah! These are what I call ‘passion projects’ which are causes or projects outside of work, usually limited to 3 per year to avoid burnout! Having a hobby (sports, art, reading, knitting, baking, etc.) and volunteering are great projects to pursue, giving you something to look forward to during the working week. Throughout my working life I have always been involved actively in community projects and, of course, the best is getting to work with ProductiveMuslimah! Research has shown that when people lead lives with projects they care about without any incentive of being paid, they are motivated to do well in other areas of life including their paid work.
Last but not least, the best advice to a working Muslimah would be to make sincere dua to Allah for success in every aspect of your life, for barakah in your time and work, and to make you of benefit to the Ummah. This has undoubtedly helped me throughout my life, academic, working and family life. Ultimately, there is no success except by Allah.


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Ramadhan Mubarak!

Ramadan Kareem everyone.

As you may or may not know, this year Ramadhan is visiting us during summer, which InsyaAllah we will experience once more to fasting from 2.30 am to 10.15 pm. This year summer temperature is scorching hot  (max temp 26 degree today), but still, I am really looking forward to my favorite time of the year, Ramadhan.  I wish you all the best of this month, may Allah shower us with His mercy, rahmah, barakah and forgiveness, ameen.

Here is a valuable excerpt from productive muslim site, how to optimize this Ramadhan in the west. 

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So, I realized that I need that secret formula which will make my Ramadan a Productive one. Alhamdulillah I finally got it and I would love to share it with all you:

It is: Intention + Du’a + Planning + Persistence= A Productive Ramadan In sha Allah!

Now let’s crack the code:

1. Intention

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allāh be upon him) said: “The reward of deeds depends upon the intentions and every person will get the reward according to what he has intended.” [Bukhari]

A pure and firm intention to making our Ramadan a productive one is the first and most important step. Until we truly want to spend this month in the manner our beloved Prophet (peace and blessings of Allāh be upon him) spent it, we will not be able to implement any of the following steps effectively. Make a sincere, firm intention NOW. Say it out aloud:

”I will iIn sha Allah spend my Ramadan seeking Allah (glorified and exalted be He)’s pleasure and doing deeds that draw me closer to Him”

The next time someone remarks about the long hours, smile and ask Allah (glorified and exalted be He) to make it easy for both of you and change the topic! Don’t dwell upon the long hours of the fast. Think positive. If Allah (glorified and exalted be He) willed it thus, He will bring us through it too. Didn’t we survive the Ramadan last year and live to tell the tale? Yet sometimes, it might seem hard to keep that intention pure and our spirits high. So when the going gets tough, remind yourself about the virtue (benefits) of what you are gaining in this blessed month. Sit in seclusion and start doing dhikr, make dua, read the ahadith about the benefits of fasting and if that doesn’t help then talk to someone and ask for motivation. If that doesn’t work, then listen to some lectures on Ramadan and read motivational articles.

2. Dua

The hours are long and the air dry. The only thing that will help us during these times is the Help of Allah (glorified and exalted be He) and His help is always a “dua away”. Start making dua from now. Ask Allah (glorified and exalted be He) to help you witness this month in all its glory and gather all the jewels that it has to offer.

• “Ya muqallibal quloob sabbit Allâh qalbee deenik.” (‘O You Who changes the hearts, make my heart firm on Your religion.’) [Tirmidhi]

and duas from the Qu’ran, which when you make in seclusion, with your heart totally focused on Allah (glorified and exalted be He), will In sha Allah make your heart strong and you will feel comforted and not alone.

• “Our Lord! Bestow on us endurance and make our foothold sure and give us help against those who reject faith.” [Qur'an: Chapter 2, Verse 250]
• “Our Lord! Take us not to task if we forget or fall into error.” [Qur'an: Chapter 2, Verse 286]
• “Our Lord! Lay not upon us such a burden as You did lay upon those before us.” [Qur'an: Chapter 2, Verse 286]
• “Our Lord! Impose not on us that which we have not the strength to bear, grant us forgiveness and have mercy on us. You are our Protector. Help us against those who deny the truth.” [Qur'an: Chapter 2, Verse 286]

3. Planning

Planning for Ramadan is the next equally important step, especially for people living in the West, who will experience these long hours as well as have their kids home for the summer vacation.

This can be broken up into 2 parts:

PRE-RAMADAN PLANNING

a) Get Your Eid Clothes and Eid Gifts Ready NOW: Look for your Eid clothes and if you order them online or ask your family back home to send it to you, then coordinate with them and get them ready and shipped to you now. You should have them before Ramadan begins or on their way. Don’t waste even a single minute deciding what to wear on Eid day. Go shopping now and get all the gifts shopped, packed and labeled for Eid. During Ramadan if you need to pick a few more, it won’t be a hassle, but buying so many will definitely be a waste of time and energy.

b) Plan Your Menu: Plan your menu for Ramadan now. Shop for and store all dry items that you will need. This will save you time, energy and money. Prepare and freeze items like patties and rolls at least 15 days before Ramadan. Cook and freeze meat curry for use in the first few days of Ramadan.

c) Analyze Yourself and Your Routine: Understand your routine, the times of the day when your energy levels are high and low, the times in the day when there are some errands that you have to run, like helping your husband get ready for work, or when your kids will need you. Optimize your high energy levels (which are normally after Fajr) for reading Qur’an. Start staying up after Fajr from now so that it does not become too difficult when Ramadan starts. Think of what you can do when your energy levels tend to drop. For example, fasting or not fasting, my low time starts after Dhuhr and goes up until 4 in the afternoon. So I plan to either sleep or if my children refuse to sleep, then I will listen to some lectures.

d) Organize Your Dua List: Mark and gather all the duas that you want to make in Ramadan. If they are not in one book, then create Word documents and get print-outs. Mark out the ones you will read after each salah, before breaking the fast, after Taraweeh and in your Tahajjud. Make separate copies and label them. You can also start memorizing some duas from now. Make a list of people you want to make duas for: some friends from long ago that you remember fondly, relatives etc. Keep your dua list or books right next to your prayer mat so that you don’t get lazy reading them if you are very tired.

e) Increase Your Stamina: Start eating less from now. Train yourself to stay hungry for a little more time each day. Exercise to increase your stamina. With the long fasting hours, small children running around and no family to help out, tempers rise very quickly on empty stomachs. Train your stomach and your anger controls of the brain not to work together.

f) Make a Goal List: Make realistic goals of how much Qur’an you want to read in a day. For example, if you aim for finishing one juz’ a day, then break it into 4 parts. Start reading it from before Fajr and end it by Asr or before Maghrib salah. Do dhikr when you are doing “anything at all” like doing your normal chores of getting ready for work, driving, cooking, cleaning etc. Eat a light meal at iftar to be able to perform Taraweeh. Aim for all 20 raka’ahs. Remember this is just for one month. Some friends took off work the last 10 days in Ramadan to concentrate on their ibadah (worship) or to do itikaf (uninterrupted worship in Ramadan). One research scholar used to stay in his lab until only an hour before iftar as coming home reminded his stomach to start growling. So he stayed in the lab where he could stay focused on his work and ibadah.

DURING RAMADAN

a) The Productive Muslim Tool Kit: Check out the Ramadan resources that Productive Muslim has to offer to make Ramadan easier and more productive.

b) Spend Time with Your Family: This is especially important for those of us living in the West, as our children will fast and meet friends in school who will ask numerous questions and might think they are weird for not eating! Mark out time, before or after iftar or before Taraweeh for some family time together to talk and listen to each other, or to simply “be” together.

4. Persistence

There will be times in a day especially during the middle of Ramadan, when your enthusiasm will dwindle. But DON’T GIVE UP. Make Ramadan buddies. It could be your spouse, your coworker at work or a friend or relative. Make your goal list together and if one starts losing steam for going for salah during office hours or starts slipping in attending Taraweeh, the other can pull him up. Encourage each other and achieve your goals together.
I pray that this Ramadan brings barakah in everything that you do and that Allah (glorified and exalted be He) showers His endless mercy on you and your loved ones always. May Allah (glorified and exalted be He) help us make our intentions pure, cleanse our hearts, understand our religion more and accept our deeds, Aameen!

Faith Friday

Totally a new home :)

The clock struck 12 but I am still working on my blog layout.  I just submitted my big, significant report I just felt a bit relieved and thought it's a good time to repair my dusty,  abandoned blog. However, it turned to be I messed it up with coding and everything and I just decided to make a  new blog and move a few of my posts from my previous blog, but as expected I lost anything else, including lovely comments from my friends and readers. But, that' s fine. InsyaAllah khair. So here it is, my new blog, Student Mom :). Enjoy! 

My long journey to the UK

As early as 15 year old, I got the thought of going abroad for higher studies. I was encouraged by my brother (Abg De), which introduced me to Edinburgh. However, at that time, I just dreamed  to become a medical doctor. So, in my secret book, I wrote; Edinburgh. UK. Doctor. It was always be in my dream to study in the UK. I was not a brilliant student back then, but I was extremely determined person and still am. Every term, I aimed for straight A’s.  Alhamdulillah, I scored straight A’s in my PMR, but not in SPM. Lucky me, in my exam slip there was no C or D. Just A and B, but, still not smart enough to secure a scholarship. So bye bye UK. Bye bye dream job.

I went to matriculation, managed to get 3.5 above and with my bff Yana, we applied for Royal College of Surgeon in Ireland. Two naive girls, walked miles and miles, chasing taxis and trains, and went to the interview. Alhamdulillah. I got the offer.5 years medical course at RCSI. Again, even though I managed to get the offer letter, I did not get the scholarship. Still. I went to UPM instead. No, I am not taking medical course and that time I realized how shallow my mind back then. I started to fell in love with lab techniques, western blot, cell culture,  I get to know biochemical pathways, genetic, and I just realize, biology is not just being a doctor. It is larger than that. I learnt about life a lot during my undergrad time. I love my course mate. We are still good friends until now.

 Final Year Trip to Genting. :)

 kak Fiza and Hafiz. A good friend of mine.

To cut a long story short, I did my Msc (fully research) at a local university. After 2 years, I finished my labwork, I got a decent job, with a generous pay (Alhamdulillah) when I was writing up my thesis. I still apply for scholarship. But now my dream is bigger, to do a doctorate at UK. I secured the scholarship, two times, and the offer from the university. However, the timing is not suitable. I was still writing up the thesis back then. I was gutted. For the first time in my life, I made up my mind, no more study application. I was tired already. The determination in me was all gone. I just felt secure with what I have. I was  a  lecturer with flexible working hours and I got a decent pay. I finally decide. Yes, this is what I want.  I fell in love with teaching. I was attached to my students, to my colleagues, to my boss. Plus, I am married to a wonderful man. We went to the mosque to listen to kuliyyah every weekend, we have a small but a convenient location home. We went back to hometown every month to visit our parents. I think, life is complete when my Gynae confirmed that I was pregnant. I have not thought about furthering my study, since we decided that time it was my husband turn to further his.

God works in a mysterious way. He wants to tell me that this is what suitable to you. I applied again when my bestie Mien encouraged me. I got fully support from my husband and my Father In Law and we got application results when I was in the labour room, fighting to deliver Muhammad. It is a YES at the right moment. Double joy! Nonetheless, it was full of struggles. I went to BTN when I was 8 month pregnant (it was still amazing though, there were quite a few of my friends were pregnant back then). We took his passport photo when he was 15 day old and fly to UK when Muhammad was 3 month old. He was a fighter like me and my husband .

Now I am here. Struggling. To quote my professor “MSc or PhD, is not the beginning that matters, but how you end it”. 

Till then,

Toodles!

My other half's MSc graduation

Assalamualaikum.

Setahun JE dah siap dah? Senang jelah macam tu

I used to think like that before. Yelah, kita ni buat research, buckets of tears, weekend 24/7 (yes, you hear me right, I even worked on the weekend during my Msc degree), tengok orang lain setahun JE dah habis. 

What I haven't seen before is the struggles, struggles and struggles. When my husband got the chance to do his MSc here in the UK, now I know it's not easy. It's never easy!

At that time, both of us were students. My husband started his MSc on September while I was already started my research two months before. Allah tested us in many ways. Among the hardest part was struggling to find the nanny for Muhammad, not to mention husband had to skip classes when the lil one was sick because I had to do my experiments, in one year, we both walked  miles to the university (to save money on pass bus, which is quite pricey),  hubby's endless group discussions and presentations, and like every Friday we had to bring Muhammad to university during Jumaat prayer. Despite all the difficulties, Allah grant us easiness, with  the considerate and helpful friends that helped to look after Muhammad and  diamond-strong support from family, we certainly have strong support system.  Alhamdulillah with Allah's generosity, everything went well and praised to Allah, my loved one graduate with merit! Alhamdulillah!!

Thanks to my bro and sis in law who flew away from Cairo to celebrate this with our small family.

p/s: It was winter graduation. The moment we stepped out the Barony Hall, the sky was dark and it was freaking cold even though it was just 5 pm.
p/s: The graduation was on 16th November 2011.

3 years ago

Exactly on this day, 3 years ago, I am married to a man who would become not only an amazing husband and father, but also my best friend.  I just cant imagine my  life without him. With him, everything falls into place.

My all time favorite poem written by Anne Bradstreet, which I always dedicate to him during our special day.

To my dear and loving husband  If ever two were one, then surely we.  If ever man were lov'd by wife, then thee.  If ever wife was happy in a man, Compare with me, ye women, if you can.  I prize thy love more than whole Mines of gold Or all the riches that the East doth hold.  My love is such that Rivers cannot quench, Nor ought but love from thee give recompetence.  Thy love is such I can no way repay. The heavens reward thee manifold, I pray.  Then while we live, in love let's so persevere That when we live no more, we may live ever.

May Allah unite us in jannah.Ameen

Faith Friday

Something to ponder


I read this on my FB wall. A great reminder indeed.


When people have a bad perception of others it mostly reflects their own qualities, is sometimes nothing more than plain jealousy.
It is wrong for us to think that just because we engage in something bad, everybody is the same.
When we think others lie, it is perhaps due to our own dishonesty or lies.
Bear in mind that there are still good people out there with sound morals and values but we are sometimes blinded.




-Mufti Menk-

Faith Friday

Surprise!!

Assalamualaikum,

Time flies! Dah masuk 10 malam terakhir Ramadhan. Life is very hectic since I am now in second year. Balik rumah, bagai sudah faham, jika husband uruskan Muhammad, saya akan ke dapur. Jika husband awal lagi dah cakap, "Hari ni I nak masak", so Muhammad akan mandi dengan ummi! :)). Tapi biasanya nak tidur mesti nak ummi ada. Semalam, sambil masak sambil dukung anak. Nasib lah Muhammad. 

A few days back, I made melon juice, teringin sangat. Dah lama tak minum air tembikai. Gigih menggunakan blender dan strainer. Alhamdulillah. Dapat merasa air tembikai. Rasa lagi lazat dari secret recipi! Hehe. Then masa berbuka, sambil berborak dengan husband, saya bercerita keinginan membeli juicer. Mudahnya nak buat jus buah. Lagi pulak kami berdua memang suka sangat minum air buah. Husband cakap, ok jugak tu. Great idea!

Keesokan hari nya, balik dari school, kami berjalan kaki ke Tesco yang hanya walking distance dengan rumah. Seperti biasa, kami lepaskan Muhammad dan berjalan jalan  di bahagian electrical appliance.

Husband melihat dan mencongak congak, mana yang bagus dan mana yang tidak juicer yang ada. Saya tak kisah pun. Lagipun, bukannya nak beli terus. Mungkin hampir waktu nak balik nanti, boleh juga beli.

haruslah sama sibuk. 5 bungkus sayur dibeli!

Setelah Muhammad pun nampak dah puas berjalan, kami balik naik private hire ke rumah. Sampai di rumah, husband hulur phone.

"Tolong pasangkan charger" kebetulan charger kami letak di tepi sofa.

Tiba tiba saya nampak ada satu kotak besar. 'COOKWORKS JUICER'. Elok je bagai bersembunyi sebelah sofa. 

My brain freezed. Tergamam. Ini siapa punya, hati mengumam. (mengumam tu! haha)

"Eh ni you beli ke?" Boleh tanya macam tu, takkan curi pulak!

"A ah.. suka tak? " husband tanya.

"wuwuwuwuw" nangis! Tak jawab pun nangis terus terharu! Haha poyo!

Dah tadi tu..jalan jalan kat tempat elektrik tu, berlakon jelah ye. Eh biasanya surprise and berlakon ni, my thing, bila pulak my husband menuntut ilmu dariku ni. Haha.. poyonyaa statement!

"Eh masa bila beli?" tanya lagi. Curious. Macam biasa. Kan pergi dan balik sekolah sama sama.

"Masa tengah hari tadi, masa nak solat kat library dengan suara you borak dengan Wini. Masa tu lari kejap pergi beli dan hantar balik" oo a ah.. memang biasanya zuhur saya dan Wini berjanji. Jadi boleh jemaah sama sama.

Gigih ok! Terharu ganda dua! Then kantoi berborak dalam reflection room. Haha..

Haish..banyaknya rezeki Allah bagi bulan puasa.

Alhamdulillahh!

Till then.

Much love,

Miey

Ramadhan kareem

Assalamualaikum.

Alhamdulillah, I am grateful that Allah has given me another chance to meet Ramadhan. Again this year, Ramadhan fall during summer, I think this is great opportunity to really bermujahadah. Eventho summer, faham jelah di Glasgow almost every week is a wet week. It is raining almost every day. It really doesn't bother me even though my husband and I walk to uni every day, but there are a few days that we still go by bus if it is rain cats and dogs. The weather is cold, I really don’t get thirsty or even extra hungry. But a bit tired but I think that is common.

I normally reached home around 6 ish, fetched Muhammad and will rest for a while before joining tadarus online with Malaysian mate from 7 – 8. At 8.15 I will start cooking and usually I will just cook a simple menu, a main course and a dessert, but I will cook extra special during weekend. I tend to cook extra so that I won’t waste time cooking for sahur. I have done a bit research before Ramadhan, how to optimize it to the max. I conclude it as below

Making the most of Ramadhan  (From the perspective of a full time mom, full time wife, full time  student)

1. Shop groceries before ramadhan, but I just keep fresh everything so vegetable I will be buy weekly. - 
2. Dzikr everytime, or just recite alfathah. Lailahaillallah. SubhanaAllah. Astaghfirullah. 
3. Allocate just 1.5 hour to cook. 
4. Ramadhan is month of quran. Read quran everyday. with tafsir. 
5. Cook only once a day and reheat during sahur, so that I wont waste time. I can use that time to tadarus or tahajud.
6. Be nice be nice be nice.  Hear no evil. See no evil. Compete with each other to do good feed. Mana ada ruang berlumba lumba untuk membuat kebaikan. 
7. Smile. It is a part of sadaqah right!
8. Ikhlas ikhlas. Fi amanillah. 
9. Be patient. Bite my tongue.Sabar sabar sabar. 
10. I personally want to change my habit to a) waste my time on the internet 

So this is time to walk the talk. It is not easy. Berubah mungkin senang. Istiqamah, that is the hardest part. But I want to take the opportunity of this holy month to change from muslimah to mukminah. Ameen.

Till then